Don’t Shoot the Messenger

What do you do when consciousness sharpens your vision, and you begin noticing what others cannot?

You see patterns clearly: the way people cling to pity stories, the way victimhood can feel like a safe identity. And yet, when you speak from clarity, you risk feeling like you no longer belong.

The temptation is strong—to join the chorus, repeat the story, belong through shared suffering. But sovereignty asks for something different. It asks you to belong to yourself first

.

I notice this again and again in my mentorships: when someone begins to see differently, especially around the topic of health, the shift can feel isolating. And with the holidays approaching, this tension only grows stronger.

The question becomes: how do we interact without bypassing anyone’s pain?

The answer is presence. Learning to see the story without being hooked by it.

Living Sovereignty in a Social World

But what about when you have to be in those spaces—at work, in family gatherings, with relatives who expect you to nod along with their pain?

This is where the practice deepens.

You cannot always choose your environment, but you can choose your participation.

• You can listen without fusing.

• You can witness without absorbing.

• You can care without carrying.

It doesn’t mean isolating yourself from others. It means holding your ground inside yourself. It means remembering: “I can acknowledge their story without making it mine.”

Sovereignty is not withdrawal. It is presence without losing yourself.

Illness as Messenger

And here’s the parallel: just as other people’s stories can pull you into unconscious belonging, so can your own body’s stories.

When illness arrives, most of us immediately explain it away:I must need more vitamins. I should exercise more.

But illness is not failure—it’s communication. The body, too, is trying to speak.

• Illness as Rest: Sometimes it’s the only way you’ll stop.

• Illness as Justification: It protects you from guilt.

• Illness as Sacrifice: It becomes the price you unconsciously pay to rest.

If you can meet your body’s story with sovereignty—listening rather than blaming—you remain aligned.

The Deeper Invitation

So whether it’s your family, your coworkers, or your own immune system—the invitation is the same: don’t shoot the messenger.

Instead of collapsing into the story, you pause.

You ask: What is this really trying to show me?

That question is sovereignty. That question is responsibility.

A New Possibility

Consciousness is not about escaping relationships or avoiding illness. It is about relating differently.

It is choosing to rest before collapse.It is choosing to listen without absorbing. It is choosing sovereignty over pity, presence over performance.

Repeat the following phrases and see if there's a connection with you:

Rest is wisdom.

Presence is medicine.

Consciousness is belonging to yourself.

Your body, like the people around you, is always speaking. May you learn to hear the message without losing yourself, and in that listening, discover freedom.

Warmly

Deby